Friday, January 24, 2014

A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle

A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle.

I did not say this. It was Irina Dunn, a student at Sydney university who scribbled this on the back of the toilet doors when she was a student in the 70's. And then it got Viral like that kolaveri thing... 
Actually there was nothing original about it. She merely paraphrased the philosopher who said,
“ Man Needs God like Fish needs a bicycle”.
I cannot say much about the  philosopher,
But trust me Irina Dunn was Soooooooooo…. wrong … because

A woman needs a man to kill cockroaches that mysteriously creep up at the kitchen sink…
A woman needs a man to change fused light bulbs… 
A woman needs a man to drive her around and lug the groceries…
A woman needs a man to make babies … 
A woman needs a man to lift the heavy baggage off the carousel at the arrival lounge in airports…

The list could have been endless … only until

Men invented powerful pest control and annihilated the entire cockroach species to near extinction …
Men invented voltage stabilizers  and energy saving lights that help them  go on for hours…
Men invented online shopping for groceries … 
Men invented sperm banks so women could have their babies …without …errr…
Men invented wheelie suitcases and trolley bags so women could just bump ‘em off the carousel…
(and walk away shooting a sweet smile and a ‘ I- am- sooo-sorry’ despite knowing that the hunk standing  besides her was silently braving his excruciating pain on the third finger of his left foot when the heavy trolley bag fell on his foot when she bumped it off the carousel…well ... men are supposed to be brave .. not cry like sissies …he will be fine…)

Men invented viA… so that women could …
Men invented viB…… so that women could … mmm …
Men invented viC…..’s   Secret to uplift … somethings

Ladies … stretch your imagination, fill in the blanks and you will get the point …

OK … coming to the real point of this blog post.
Irina Dunn … may have been right.
And I will tell you why.

It was a Saturday.  The plan was to go shopping and then catch up with friends over a movie.  
It was getting late. I carried the shopping bags and came to the parking lot to start the car.
No guesses for what happened. One of the tyres was going flat.
 I was the one carrying everyone’s tickets for the movie. And  there was just 40 minutes left.
The tyre couldn’t have chosen a better time to get punctured.’

There was no way I could abandon my car in the middle of the road and get to the theatre.  
I called my friends to tell them my woes.  One of them came flying on his bike like the Aamir Khan in Dhoom3, no, not to take me but to get the tickets so that they all do not miss out on the movie.
He took one look at my car and another one at my face.

There was this smirk on his face that only men are capable of giving when …

When they help a delicate little thing to lift the luggage off the carousel or
When they have just rescued the damsel in distress from the trauma of having confronted a live cockroach.

Drive on … he said. 
But ….but the tyre is punctured, I Said.
Drive on … he said with that smirky smile on his face. 

And I obeyed.  

Ladies … put your hands together for mankind and their wonderful  invention
The tubeless tyres.

A tubeless tyre can go on and on for another 30-40 kms or atleast till you hit the ‘Puncher shop’.

In the good old days a Woman needed a man to fix up the flat tyre.

Lifting a heavy spare tyre, pushing up the jack, screwing up ( the nuts and the bolts), was not for the faint hearted fairer sex.  
But not any more.  
Not after the invention Tubeless tyres and not to forget the Hydraulic jack.
The Hydraulic jack takes away the drudgery of having to huff and puff of lifting up the car to fit the wheel in.
Amazing inventions !!! 

Maybe it is true.

A woman needs a man … like a fish needs a bicycle.
Irina Dunn was a visionary.

Forgive Mankind … for they know not what they invent. 

This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda.


  1. hahahahahahahaha loved the post...wonderful

  2. hahaha...good one...but at least men are required for all these inventions :p


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